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12-05-2022 - Written by Jett Oxy - Follow on medium 


Tease & Denial / How to Tease your partner in bed 


Are you looking for a way to spice up your bedroom play? If so, then you may want to consider incorporating some tease and denial into your repertoire. Tease and denial can be a fun and exciting way to add some anticipation and excitement to your sex life. Not sure how to get started? Then read on for some tips on how to tease your partner in bed. With a little practice, you'll be experts at teasing and denying in no time!


WHAT IS TEASE & DENIAL? 

In a nutshell, tease and denial is when you get your partner all worked up without letting them orgasm. It’s a way to keep the sexual tension high and increase the pleasure for both of you.


There are lots of different ways to tease and deny your partner. You can start by kissing them passionately, then pull away just as they’re getting really into it. Or you can touch them all over their body, paying special attention to their erogenous zones, but not letting them go over the edge.


The key is to keep things unpredictable so that your partner never knows when they’re going to get relief. This will keep them on edge and heighten their senses, making the eventual climax even more intense.


Of course, you need to make sure that your partner is actually enjoying this game – otherwise it can just be frustrating! Talk about what you’re doing as you go along, and check in frequently to make sure they’re still having fun.

Full Wikipedia definition KInkly definition 


Tease and Denial

THE DIFFERENT TYPES OF TEASE AND DENIAL


When it comes to teasing your partner in bed, there are a few different approaches you can take. Depending on what turns your partner on, you can either go for the slow and sensual route, or the more playful and mischievous one.


The slow and sensual route is all about building up the sexual tension between you and your partner. This can be done by gently touching them in places that turn them on, kissing them passionately, or whispering naughty things in their ear. The key is to take things slow and not let them get too carried away. This will only make the final release all the more sweeter for both of you.


If you want to take a more playful approach, then you can start by blindfolding your partner or tying them up (if they're into that). This will heighten all their other senses and make them even more responsive to your touch. You can then proceed to tease them all over their body, focusing on their erogenous zones. Again, the key is to take things slow so that they're always left wanting more.


Another option is to incorporate some toys or devices into play, for example a male chastity cage or a female chastity belt. While caged, the wearer is not allowed a release until the keyholder decides so. This is bringing tease and denial to a totally different level as the wearer is at the mercy of the partner, and will do everything to please and get - eventually released. 


All of these approaches can be extremely effective in getting your partner hot and bothered. So experiment and see what works best for the two of you!

Not sure of your size or what cage to choose, we recommend our beginner set or the discovery set. The variety of sizes within the box will allow you to find what fits best for your needs.


Feel free to browse all Oxy’s chastity devices collection and use the smart calculator to help you define your sizing. 


Sissy Chastity Belt
Female chastity Belt


WHAT TO DO DURING TEASE AND DENIAL?


If you really want to get your partner going to bed, then you need to learn how to tease them. Teasing can be a great way to build sexual tension and get your partner hot and bothered. The key is to be playful and not to overdo it. Here are some tips on how to tease your partner:

  1. Start with some light touching. Run your hands over their body, lightly tracing their curves. Pay attention to their reaction and back off if they seem uncomfortable.
  2. Get verbal. Whisper in their ear, telling them what you’re going to do to them or what you’d like them to do to you.
  3. Use props. Feathers, ice cubes, and massage oils can add an extra element of excitement.
  4. Take your time. The longer you draw out the teasing, the more intense the eventual release will be.
  5. Wear a chastity device to enhance the play and hand over the key to your partner. You will be released once your partner has decided so and has teased you enough for you to not be able to hold anymore. 
  6. Have fun! This is supposed to be enjoyable for both of you, so make sure that everyone is comfortable and enjoying themselves.

WHAT GAMES CAN YOU PLAY AS TEASE AND DENIAL? 


Now that you know what tease and denial is, it's time to talk about how you can try the games with your partner.


Most people don't want to admit they need to work on their sex life, or that things are getting stale. They'll say it's because they're happy together. But this is a great opportunity for couples to reassess their situation, take charge of their sexuality, and have some fun in the bedroom. So without further ado, here are some tips for giving tease and denial a try.


  • "Tie and Tease". In this game, the person being teased is tied up and then the teaser will proceed to torture them with various activities such as tickling, flicking, pinching, etc. The goal of the game is to make the person being teased squirm and beg for mercy. Activities involving tying up a person and then teasing them are intense both physically and psychologically. This is because strong feelings of sexual frustration lead the person to feel helpless because they cannot move from the position in which they are tied up.

  • "The Edge Game". This game is similar to the torture game, but instead of using physical sensations to tease the person, you use mental stimulation. This could include talking dirty to them, telling them erotic stories, or even just describing in detail what you're going to do to them later. This involves bringing your partner right to the edge of orgasm, then backing off before they can reach climax. This can be done repeatedly for an extended period of time, until both of you are ready to explode.

  • “The tease and switch”: Tease your partner with one type of stimulation (oral sex, for example), then switch to something completely different (anal play) just as they’re about to reach orgasm. This will leave them begging for more – and you are in control.

  • “Round robin”: Have each person take turns being the teaser and the recipient. This way, everyone gets a taste of the fun.

  • “ Chastity” : Some other forms of sexual denial include reducing or depriving any genital stimulation. This could mean using a chastity device to prevent genital touch, or not allowing an erection. A chastity belt can be used to restrict the release of semen during ejaculation for men. This is alternatively possible through some other sort of device, both for men and women.

There are many chastity games available, read:


“ Male Strap on Harness : It is basically a Strap on Harness dildo usually used by females, but now by a man. It allows you to penetrate the partner but prevents the ability to orgasm to the wearer - Used together with a chastity device, it will surely bring you to the edge. This is different from pegging as in this case, the strap on replace the man’s dick during the all sexual experience.


It can be used only as a foreplay however, making a longer lasting sex for the one beeing penetrated, thus easier to reach orgasmic highs.



  • Remote Control Toys: With a remote control toy, you or your partner can take charge of your pleasure, increasing or decreasing the intensity as they see fit. The possibilities are endless, making for a truly unique and exciting experience each and every time.
    One type is a wearable vibrator that can be controlled remotely. This allows your partner to have complete control over when you get to orgasm, making it a perfect way to tease and deny you until they decide you can have release.

    Another type of remote control toy that can be used for this purpose is a cock ring with a built-in vibrator, such as the Lelo Tor 2. This allows your partner to not only control when you get to orgasm, but also how intense your orgasms will be. They can start off slow and then ramp up the intensity as you get closer and closer to the edge, making for a very teasing and tantalizing experience.

    Finally, the BDSM scene is gifted by creative ideas, such as an app controlled chastity device, with a timer - The Cellmate by Qiui. Or the Little devil collar - a remote control shock collar which is used in submissive training and during tease and denial play sessions.

HOW TO APPROACH MY WIFE WITH TEASING & DENIAL? 

It is important not to feel shy. You are talking to your partner – someone who has seen virtually every side of you, especially the vulnerable. Try to be bold. If you're too self-conscious, your suggestions might come off as silly. If delivery is perfect during the height of sexual tension, it is incredibly stimulating and piques your partner's yearning for you. 


With little confidence and some practice, you discover that this new addition to your sex life will add a new layer of arousal and attraction for each other. 


There's everything to gain and nothing to lose. Go for it. 

Teasing and Denial


WHAT TO SAY DURING TEASE & DENIAL? 


Teasing and denial don't only happen physically; it is also very helpful in stepping up your dirty talk game. Like many folks in the sack, you are most likely repetitive with your dirty talk in the bedroom; your partner hears a handful of select phrases, depending on whatever move you are trying to spin.


When you sprinkle in a little tease and denial to the mix, you’re bound to unleash a new vocabulary of dirty talk to your lover. Consider the following scenarios: asking them to beg; teasing them about what you won’t give them yet (no matter how badly they want it); and telling them how much you will please them later. This is an excellent way to incorporate new grammar into your bedroom talk and simple, dirty fun.


When restraining your partner (sometimes for real) and keeping them from reaching those ecstatic peaks, asking them what they want from you at that moment can feel criminally sexy. There’s a distinct quality about your partner’s breathy voice as they tell you exactly what they want out loud.


Go for this kind of dirty talk before you even begin to have sex. Once you have agreed on the specific tease and denial games from the start, be bold; whisper into their ear that you’ll have them begging by the time you’re done, and see how much you both enjoy it.  


THE DRAWBACKS OF TEASE AND DENIAL 


There are pros and cons to everything in life and tease and denial is no different. On the one hand, it can be a fun and exciting way to spice up your sex life and keep your partner guessing. On the other hand, it can also be frustrating and even lead to arguments if not done correctly.

The key to a successful tease and denial experience is communication. You need to be clear with your partner about what you want to do, why you want to do it, and how far you're willing to go. Once you've established those boundaries, have fun with it! Try different techniques and see what works for you both.

And remember, the most important thing is that everyone is enjoying themselves. If at any point someone isn't comfortable, stop immediately.


CONCLUSION


There are many ways to tease your partner in bed and the options are really only limited by your imagination. However, one thing to keep in mind is that not everyone enjoys the same type of teasing. So, it's important to communicate with your partner and find out what turns them on. Once you know what they like, you can have a lot of fun experimenting with different ways to tease them. Remember, the goal is to make them want more and more until they can't take it anymore!


Article Written by Jett Oxy for oxy-shop.com. 

Jett is the owner of Oxy-shop.com, a BDSM insider, a sex educator and writer. 

"I always try to explore the confines of the BDSM world and bring valuable insights for new comers joining our adventure" 

Phd in related field, father and business owner, Jett Oxy brings you stories and advices  for educational and entertainment purposes. 


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