HOW TO USE FETLIFE TO BROADEN YOUR BDSM LEARNING

01-02-2023 - Written by Jett Oxy

Every kink lover needs a community where they can meet like-minded people and ask questions bothering them. Since late 2008, FetLife has proven to be an ideal community for this. Also known for organizing educational events relevant to the BDSM world, FetLife has worked its way to be considered an amazing well of knowledge and interaction for kinky individuals.

However, sadly, FetLife gets so many trolls and negative feedback because of the difficulty people face in getting information from the site. But, not to worry. This article will teach you everything you need to know about how to effectively use FetLife to broaden your knowledge in BDSM. If you're new to BDSM, you might also want to check out our comprehensive guide to BDSM to get started.

WHAT IS FETLIFE?

Let us start by establishing what FetLife is not. FetLife is not a meat market. It is not a place for finding a dominant or submissive or even a life partner.

However, we can not rule out the possibility of you finding a kinky partner.

We may now talk about what FetLife is. FetLife is like Facebook, but for kinky people. It is a social media platform created to enable kinky individuals form a community for interaction and to get answers to questions about their kinky lifestyle.

Just like every other social media platform, you have the option to join groups, share photos, post writings, comment on other people's posts to help you interact with other people so you can make friends. There are different groups to suit each person's interests so ensure you join one that best tickles your fancy. If you're looking for other platforms to explore your interests, you might also be interested in our guide to the best dating sites for Fetish and BDSM desires.

HOW TO MAXIMIZE FETLIFE AS A NEW SIGN-UP MEMBER

Being a new sign-up member on FetLife can be a little overwhelming. It is okay to feel nervous, alone and out of place. If you have not signed up, you may want to hurry up and do that before we check out how to settle in fine. Here are some few tips on how you can settle in quickly:

Fill out your profile honestly, but you do not have to overshare.
Upload a nice picture of you. A picture of your dick or pussy is great. However, it is not sufficient. Post other pictures of you.
Post a list of your fetishes. Just post the most relevant ones so you do not bore people who check your profile.
Join groups that are relevant to your interests. They help provide a sense of belonging, especially if you feel lost in the entire FetLife community.
Participate in groups, post your thoughts about different issues in the kink world, air your opinions about other people's posts. You get to learn a lot of things faster when you do this.
Before you send someone a friendship request, send them a message first.
It is a community of people with different personalities so be prepared to get your toes stepped on. However, you would be doing yourself a lot of good by not taking anything personal. See every silly opinion as another learning experience and not an attack on your views.
Also, ensure you are not the one posting silly things. Think before posting.

Add us as your friend on Fetlife and start the journey!

Oxy-Shop Fetlife Profile

HOW TO GET INFORMATION ABOUT BDSM USING FETLIFE

You may broaden your knowledge about BDSM through a variety of features on FetLife.com; the search box, a person's profile, groups, activity feed and the writing section. Let us now look at these features one after the other and how you can use them to learn:

The Search Box: You can use the search box to search topics that interest you. Examples of topics that can be searched using the search box are: usernames (called Kinksters), groups for every kink imaginable such as munch groups, fetishes, events, cons, play parties, munches and the likes and locations.

However, there are topics you can not find in the search box. They include: user stats (height, weight, location, fetish commonalities, other personal ads information), group discussion thread topics, pictures and videos.

A Person's Profile: This has a way of telling you a lot about what a person enjoys, how much experience they have and the groups they have participated in. You may now use their status feed to read what they are currently commenting on, follow their sites all over the web and see what events they are planning on attending. Before you realize it, you have learnt so much by just going through a person's profile.
Activity Feed: This is the Fetlife home page once you are logged in. You can update it with your status or leave short comments about your kink lifestyle at the top. It also shows everything your friends are doing which you can learn from. However, you have the option to filter what appears on your activity feed using the feature on the left-hand side.
Groups: This is the best feature for finding information on FetLife. They are like individual forums with each of them run by members of FetLife.

Each group has an about page and a separate discussion thread with roles attached. Ensure you read them before making a post so you do not make an offensive post to the group.

The Writing Section: Keeping a journal on FetLife gives you an opportunity to express your opinions and help you learn from others when they comment on what you have written.

HOW TO DELETE YOUR FETLIFE ACCOUNT

Follow these simple steps to delete your FetLife account:

Visit https://fetlife.com/settings/account

Click on “Deactivate or Delete my Account”
Confirm you want to delete your account

Alternatively, you can go directly to the delete profile option here:

https://fetlife.com/deactivate?type=permanently%20delete

After deleting your profile, all your data will be deleted after seven days.

FAQS

Are There More Men Than Women On FetLife?

According to Baku, "…we have an unconventionally large number of women on the site. The majority of dating sites have under five to 10 per cent women, but we have a ratio of almost 50-50. Or let’s say 40-50, when I put in the genderqueer, male-to-female and female-to-male people.”

CONCLUSION

In spite of its flaws, FetLife still serves as one of the most reliable platforms for kink and BDSM lovers to socialize, bond and learn from each other. For people who are termed 'odd' in the society, the relevance of a community like this can ever be overemphasized. We hope you follow our tips and have a nice time being a part of the FetLife community. If you're interested in exploring more aspects of BDSM, you might want to check out our comprehensive guide to BDSM training.

Article Written by Jett Oxy for oxy-shop.com.

Jett is the owner of Oxy-shop.com, a BDSM insider, a sex educator and writer.

"I always try to explore the confines of the BDSM world and bring valuable insights for new comers joining our adventure"

PhD in related field, father and business owner, Jett Oxy brings you stories and advices for educational and entertainment purposes.

Follow on medium - Follow on twitter